DiseaseHealth Care

Asexual- What Does It Mean to Be Asexual?

Define the term of Asexual:

Asexual is defined as a lack of sexual attraction to others or a lack of desire to engage in sexual activity. Asexuality is defined by some as their sexual orientation, while others define it as a lack of sexual orientation.

Asexual can also refer to a broad range of asexual sub-identities, including demisexuality, grey-A, queerplatonicity, and many others. People who are asexual can recognize as cisgender, non-binary, transgender, or other gender.

Asexual persons frequently experience romantic (but not sexual) feelings for others. They may classify as heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, or pansexual. Others are aromantic, which means they have no romantic feelings for other individuals.

Other terms for Asexual is ace or aces.

Being asexual, however, implies various things to different people.

  • Some people may only feel sexual desire in extremely specific situations. For example, a demisexual person who some argue fits under the asexual label — only feels sexual desire when they have a close relationship.
  • To put it another way, they may only be sexually attracted to persons who are in a love romantic relationship with them.
  • Even if they don’t feel sexual attraction, some people prefer to have a sexual relationship.
  • Simply said, everyone’s experiences with being asexual is unique, and there is no standard way to be asexual.

Some people are completely devoid of sexual desire. Other types of attraction can be experienced by asexual persons who do not feel sexual attraction.

Aside From Sexual Attraction

Romantic Attraction-

Wishing to be in a love relationship

Aesthetic Attraction-

Being drawn to someone because of their appearance

Sensual Or Physical Attraction-

Want to grasp, touch, or cuddle someone

Platonic Attraction-

Want to become friends with someone

Emotional Attraction-

Wishing to form an emotional bond with someone

Asexual persons can feel all of these types of attraction, as well as many more.

Facts About Asexuality

Sexual desire and sex drive can exist in asexual persons.


Libido, sometimes known as “sex drive,” is the desire to have sex and feel sexual pleasure as well as release. It could feel a little like scratching an itch for some individuals.

Sexual Desire

The urge to have sex, whether for pleasure, a personal connection, conception, or whatever, is referred to as this.

Sexual Attraction

Finding person sexually attractive and desiring to have sex with them comes under this category.

Many persons who aren’t asexual have low libidos and don’t want to have sex. Many asexual persons, likewise, have libido and may feel sexual desire.

People who are asexual may still masturbate or have sex.
After all, sexuality does not always imply a lack of interest in sex. It simply implies they are not attracted to others sexually.

For a variety of reasons, an asexual person may wish to have sex, including:

  • For desire
  • To become parent
  • To provide happiness to their relationship
  • To enjoy the sensation of sex
  • Affection (both giving and receiving)
  • Sex for the sensuous pleasure of caressing and hugging

Of course, some asexuals have little to no sex drive or sexual desire, which is perfectly OK because asexuality may mean various things to different individuals.

Many Asexuals Desire For And Engage In Romantic Relationships-

  • Although an asexual person may not sense sexual attraction, they may feel romantic attraction.
  • Asexual persons might be romantically attracted to persons of the same sex, persons of other genders, or people of different genders.
  • Many asexuals desire and engage in romantic relationships. They could form romantic connections with other asexual persons or with non-asexual people.

Sexual Intimacy With Partners Is Possible For Asexual Persons-

  • Because sexual desire varies from sexual attraction, some asexual persons do have sex.
  • In other terms, you may not feel compelled to have sex with someone every time you see them, but you may desire to do it on occasion.
  • Every asexual individual is unique. Some people are horrified by sex, while others are unconcerned about it, and yet others like it.

Sexuality Is A Spectrum

  • Many individuals think of sexuality as a spectrum.
  • Asexuality may also be a spectrum, with some persons having no sexual interest, others having a little amount of sexual attraction, and yet others having a lot of sexual attraction.
  • Graysexuals either don’t experience sexual attraction at all or have a very low level of it. Many individuals regard graysexuality as a common way between sexuality and asexuality, according to the Asexual Visibility & Education Network (AVEN).


Aromantic refers to a romantic orientation that differs from sexual orientation. Although most people confuse the two, they are not the same.

Aromatic people are not attracted to romantic partners. They like nonromantic partnerships and close friendships.

Queer platonic relationships, or QPPs, will be formed by many aromantic persons. QPPs are platonic partnerships with the same level of commitment as romantic ones. Some QPP members opt to live together or have children with one another.


Demisexuals are attracted to others sexually or romantically, but only after they have built a strong emotional bond with them.

Grayromantic Or Graysexual

People who are graysexual or grayromantic describe as both sexual and asexual. This includes, but is not limited to, the following:

persons who only feel romantic desire on rare occasions

Sexual Desire As Well As Attraction Are Not The Same As Romantic Desire As Well As Attraction-

  • Having sex with someone is not the same as wanting to be in a love relationship with them.
  • It’s also vital to note that sexual desire varies from romantic desire, just like sexual attraction varies from romantic attraction.
  • You may want a love connection without also liking sex, and the other way around.

Nonromantic Partnerships Are Valued By Certain People

  • Some asexuals have no desire for romantic connections.
  • Aromantic persons have little to no romantic attraction, just as asexual people have little to no sexual desire. Aromantic persons include some asexual persons, but not all.
  • One way to express nonromantic interactions is queerplatonic, a term that emerged in the asexual and aromantic groups.
  • A queerplatonic relationship, according to AVEN, is a particularly intimate connection. People in a queerplatonic relationship are equally as dedicated as those in a romantic relationship, despite the lack of passion.
  • A queerplatonic relationship is possible for everyone, regardless of their romantic or sexual orientation.

Some People’s Ability To Attract Or Want Changes Throughout Time

  • Many people think of themselves as having a good identity.
  • They may believe they are asexual one day because they have little or no sexual interest. After a few weeks or months, people may notice a change and notice that sexual desire is more frequent.
  • Similarly, someone may identify as heterosexual or bisexual, only to discover later that they are asexual.
  • This does not imply that they were previously incorrect or perplexed. It also doesn’t imply that your sexual orientation is a “fad” or something you’ll outgrow.

Your Ability To Attract People Isn’t Set

Some people’s attraction to others appears to be changing over time. This is very safe.

Just though an asexual person has previously experienced sexual desire does not destroy their identity.

Your asexual identification is still genuine if you ever had sexual desire but no longer do.
People who can no longer define as asexual are in the same boat.

You might be asexual at first but later discover you are sexually attracted. This isn’t to say you were never sexually active. It’s possible that your orientation has shifted over time.

It Can Refer To Celibacy Or Abstinence-

  • Many individuals mistakenly assume that asexuality is identical with celibacy or abstinence.
  • Abstinence refers to the decision to stop from having intercourse. This is often just temporary. Someone may decide to stop having sex:
  • Till they tie the knot
  • Through a trying time in their lives
  • Celibacy refers to a long-term decision to avoid from sexual activity and maybe marriage. For religious, cultural, or personal reasons, many people resolve to celibacy for the rest of their lives.
  • One significant distinction is that abstinence and celibacy are both voluntary commitments. Asexuality has no effect.
  • Furthermore, asexual persons may not abstain from sex at all, and those who choose celibacy or abstinence may sense sexual desire.

It’s A Medical Problem

Many people believe that asexual persons have something “wrong” with them.

The world appears to believe that everyone is sexually attracted. As a result, asexual persons may fear that something is wrong with them if they don’t experience the same level of desire.

However, asexuality is not a medical condition that requires treatment.

It should go without saying that being asexual is not the same as having:

  • intimacy phobia
  • libido decline
  • suppression of sexuality
  • sexual repulsion
  • sexual impotence

Regardless of sexual orientation, anybody can acquire one or more of these disorders.

It only occurs when someone is unable to locate the proper mate.

Some well-intentioned individuals may believe that asexual persons will experience sexual desire when they meet the “proper” person, but this is not the case. It’s not about romance or finding love.

In truth, many asexual persons want to be in romantic relationships, and many asexual people are in happy, healthy partnerships.

Sex isn’t required for romance, and romance isn’t required for sex.

In What Ways Can Asexuality Affect Relationships?

With enough of honest communication, a romantic relationship where one person is asexual and the other isn’t can totally work. Isn’t this similar to any other healthy relationship?

If you’re asexual, discuss to your partner about the kinds of sexual activities you’re receptive to (if any), as well as any other sex-related boundaries you have.

Maybe both you and your partner desire to be in a long-term relationship, but your spouse has a much stronger sex drive. You might attempt an open relationship, in which your spouse has other sexual partners but still cares about you emotionally.

What matters most is that both partners are honest about their wants and understand that, while sexual attraction can change with time, it may not. As a result, assuming that an asexual partner would develop sexual interest is often unhelpful.

Keep in mind that having a high sex drive and wanting to have sex frequently is perfectly normal (and healthy). Some folks are simply not compatible. If your spouse is asexual and refuses to have sex but will not contemplate an open relationship, you should think about whether the relationship satisfies your requirements (which are entirely valid, too).

Is There A Cause At Job?

  • Asexuality, like homosexuality and bisexuality, has no underlying “cause.” It’s simply how someone is.
  • Asexuality isn’t a result of genetics, trauma, or whatever.
  • Speaking with a caring, LGBTQIA+ accepting therapist can assist if you are experiencing any discomfort as a result of your orientation, or if you are unsure about your orientation or what your lack of sexual desire could signify.

How Do I Know If I’m Asexual?

Although there is no precise test to determine if you are
asexual or not, you may assess your wants and consider whether they correspond
with typical asexual traits by asking yourself a few crucial questions.

Consider the following:

  • To me, what does sexual attraction imply?
  • Do I have feelings of sexual attraction?
  • What are my thoughts on the subject of sex?
  • Do I feel obligated to be interested in sex because it is
  • expected of me?
  • Is sex significant in my life?
  • Do I have a strong desire to have sex with attractive
  • people?
  • How do I like to express affection?
  • Does sex play a role?

There are no “correct” or “wrong” responses to these questions, but they might help you think about your


Some persons are asexual, while some people are homosexual or bisexual. Asexual people have little or no interest in sex. They may or may not be attracted to each other romantically and may or may not engage in sexual activities.

On the asexual spectrum, persons range from those who have no sexual or romantic desire to those who engage in sexual contact under certain circumstances. Many asexuals develop meaningful, long-term relationships, and some marry or have children.

Asexuality is not same as celibacy/abstinence, which both imply that someone feels sexually attracted but does not act on it.


The opinions presented in this article should not be regarded as a replacement for medical advice. For more information, please contact your treating physician.

Related Articles

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Back to top button
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x